Getting Rude : Guest post from Nicci Talbot
Nicci Talbot is the founder of Rude Magazine, an on-line magazine covering sex, politics, the arts and more, she’s our guest blogger today and is here to talk about her latest project to develop a series of ebooks on sexuality and to ask for your help.
I set up Rude Magazine in 2012, the aim being to provide an alternative to mainstream women’s mags with their narrow focus on celebrity, gossip and lifestyle. It has grown out of my personal blog about sex, health and well-being and is now an on-line magazine covering sex, politics, interviews, oral histories, arts and reviews.
The aim is to open up discussion around issues that affect women – contraception, equal rights, abortion, ageing and sex, sex-ed, parenting and work, so we’ve covered topics like ‘submissive feminists’, the ethics of using your ‘erotic capital’ at work, and Rosie Wilby’s monologue ‘Is Monogamy Dead?’ plus Meg Barker’s excellent book ‘Rewriting the Rules’ on modern relationships. We’ve also covered Jerry Barnett’s Sex & Censorship campaign, ‘Coming Out’ as a bisexual in light of Stephen Fry’s recent documentary about homosexuality, and how it feels to be a female abortion provider doing ‘Dirty Work’, as surgeon/author Gabriel Weston explores in her latest book.
Sex toys are another part of our erotic toolkit, opening up communication around sexual desires and what we want. It’s a growing market and increasingly high end so we encourage you to have a little fun with this and use your imagination to make your own toys – household kink anyone? Or how about ’10 toys you can find in discount stores’ and a how to create a DIY dungeon…
Communication is also an issue – how to talk about sex and express (as well as identify) your desires. We don’t always know what we like or want until we’re introduced to something new, which is why erotica is a great way to explore fantasies. A recent study by online boutique Play Kinky found that over 53% of us aren’t honest with our partners about our sexual desires yet ¾ of us think it would improve things in the bedroom if we were. So there’s still some taboo around sexual activities, fetishes and kink play. I aim to explore the psychology of kink and what people get out of certain activities and fetishes as I think this will provide an alternative perspective on the ‘scene’.
I am developing a series of Rude ebooks, which will focus on common concerns and enduring questions – how to keep a long-term relationship fresh, how to ‘marry’ desire and passion with stability and compromise, reconnecting sexually with your partner post-baby, using sexual energy to create change in your life, and sex after menopause and beyond.
So I’d love to open up a conversation around these topics and find out what issues, questions and concerns you have to help me target the books. Here’s a survey link to provide feedback and if you provide your email address I’ll enter you into a prize draw to win a toy from Nexus.Take the survey!
Find Nicci online here: